All looks serene in Denver's Washington Park as autumn approaches, but this past summer vandals have been blowing up portable toilets. In fact, this has happened four times this year at Washington Park alone. And why are people doing this? As usual, social media is to blame - videos of exploding portable toilets are evidently very popular on sites such as TikTok. In other words, little sh*ts are to blame. Surprise! According to Denver Parks and Recreation, half the restrooms in parks across the city are out of commission. And the solution to this problem? Sadly, I don't think it is feasible to eliminate all those goofy video sharing apps - let alone all those damn smart phones - and so the city will just have to catch them in the act and impose community service sentences on them. I suggest 60 days cleaning out those portable toilets. If they are doing a good job, after 30 days they can be given gloves and a brush.
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